


Until You Were Gone

by AzkadelliA



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-08
Updated: 2017-10-13
Packaged: 2018-12-25 08:07:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12031695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AzkadelliA/pseuds/AzkadelliA
Summary: Beta Kindergarten is still dangerous. Even without Jasper.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello guys! Thank you for your interest. It's my first attempt to write such a thing, so I'll gladly accept any kind of remarks. Feel free to comment below! For now - enjoy the first part of the story!

"Didn't you tell me that all of imprisoned corruptions ran away? Like, after you beat Jasper?" Lapis bent her brows. She didn't want to be here. Everything in Beta Kindergarten reminded her about ex-prisoner. Yes, she wasn't here when Peridot and Smokey Quartz had defeated that Quartz soldier, but still... Simply, Jasper was rather sensitive topic.

  
"Yeah, but what if some of them had come back? We cannot be sure." Steven smiled at her. Probably he didn't realize that this place would remind Lapis about Jasper, otherwise he would never insist on her to come here. Technically, he was right. This was the first time Lapis come to Beta Kindergarten at all. She had never seen Jasper here. She wouldn't even have known that it was her "birth place," unless Peridot had told her.

  
"Besides, you absolutely have to see the place, where I, the great Peridot, had provided my most powerful attack!" said green gem proudly, placing a hand on her chest. Lapis could not help, but smirk at the sight. "Yeah, sure."

  
Probably, that was the true reason of their visit. Peridot just wanted to show her barn mate the place of her grandiose victory. She had been speaking about beating Jasper the whole day when she returned from that mission! Lapis relaxed a bit. Now she was almost sure that there would be no corrupted gems. It was just the trick to bring her here. And Jasper was bubbled somewhere inside the Temple. Nothing bad was going to happen. Blue gem looked at her two companions and couldn't control the smile. It was obvious that Steven and Peridot were both excited, those figurative stars in their eyes spoke for themselves. Lapis chuckled and finally relaxed fully. "Okay-okay, I'm all eyes and ears! Ready to be impressed!"

  
"We are almost here!" announced Steven cheerfully and Peridot laughed, rubbing her hands in anticipation. She was so determined... Lapis didn't understand why she was like this, but found it rather cute. Well, the whole Peridot seemed rather cute lately. After all, she was able to break the mental ice wall, which Lapis built around herself. They had enough time to get to know each other better. They were mostly alone, only Steven visited them time to time. And now they had Veggie Head, their field, rebuilt barn... Honestly, it was everything Lapis needed now. She was satisfied with her new life. She still missed Homeworld sometimes, but Steven told her that humans call it "homesickness." He said that it was normal and Lapis saw no reason to doubt about his words.

  
It seemed that Peridot couldn't held it anymore. With her usual "nye-he-he!" she ran forward and left their sight of view behind the rocks. "Hey, not fair!" laughed Steven and increased his speed. Lapis chuckled and picked the boy up, summoning her water wings. "Hold on!" with few flaps they reached their destination and saw excited Peridot again.

  
"There it is!" green gem waved her hands in the air with big smile on her face. "Jasper was standing right here and Smokey was over there and..." after a moment, Lapis was washed away by the waterfall of hardly recognizable, but excited speech of Peridot. Steven could hardly get a word in edgewise, only sometimes adding some details here and there. As usual, technician couldn't stand still, providing her fiery speech with different kind of movements. Steven decided to take an advantage of it and in the next moment Lapis was watching the show "How we beat Jasper. Starring Peridot as Peridot and Steven Universe as everyone else." It was impossible to stay calm at this sight! Despite described situation was serious and not funny, blue gem was laughing heartily.

  
Finally Steven and Peridot stopped. Boy began to giggle as well, while green gem smiled proudly. She was glad every time she made Lapis laugh. And, to be honest, she was good at this now. Lapis wasn't so grumpy or sad anymore and the sight of upset Lazuli was rather rare these days. Big part in it took Peridot herself. Somehow she always knew what to do at this or that situation. She was able to chase away Lapis' fears and awful memories before her barn mate was overtaken by it. And Peridot knew that water gem felt gratitude for this. Maybe Lapis didn't show it too often or not so clearly, but Peri didn't care. It was enough just to see happy Lazuli. To see her smile like this, to hear her cute snorts when she laughs... It aroused strange feelings inside Peridot's chest. Some uncontrollable pulsation, which was sending waves of pleasing warmth around her tiny body.

  
Peridot found herself smiling goofy while looking at Lapis, when she noticed some movement on the rock above the blue gem. Technician frowned a little and visually scanned that place again. Everything seemed as usual. Read - dead. Beta Kindergarten was abandoned long time ago and it seemed that even living creatures from Earth didn't want to live here. But Peridot could swear that she saw something on the rocks! She grumbled and adjusted her visor. Probably her sights failed her. It was just a shadow... But what was the source of it? Peridot and Steven were sure there would be no corruptions. Who would even like to come back here? They lured Lapis to the Kindergarten just for fun! But what if they were wrong?.. This thought sent chill down her spine. Peridot froze, checking surroundings. Eventually, Lapis and Steven noticed her strange behavior.

  
"Peridot, are you okay?" Blue gem sounded worried... She reached out a hand and was about to make a step when the shadow appeared again, dangerously close to Lapis. "Watch out!!" Peridot panicked and maybe it was her fatal mistake. She couldn't think clearly, she just wanted to protect her barn mate! Lapis had no time to summon her water wings to fly off and she didn't even see potential danger at all! Neither had Steven. He couldn't use his bubble to protect Lapis in time... So, small gem did the first thing that came to mind - she rushed towards and jumped on Lazuli, pushing her away. Peridot saw her surprised face and belated shock in these bright blue eyes. Lapis still didn't realize what was going on. Well, at least Peridot gained some time for them.

  
What happened next was a surprise to her. Hit wasn't as strong as she had expected. It surely wouldn't crush Lazuli and it wouldn't damage Peridot. However, the attack wasn't over yet. She still felt the body of corruption against her own. It was so hot and made strange sounds... In the next moment, the true attack came through Peridot's body. With whirring noise she was hit by electrical discharge and thrown to the side. Everything happened so quickly and only her green gemstone landed to the ground. It meant, Steven and Lapis were standing against the corruption on their own now.

  
"P-peridot..." At first Lapis didn't understand why she was pushed away. Water gem recoiled and made few steps back to keep the balance. Lapis riveted her gaze on Peridot and, despite next events were going far too fast, she saw everything painfully slow. On the spot, where she was standing just a moment ago, were Peridot and corrupted gem. Now she understood. This stupid piece of a gem decided to take the hit for her! Lapis wasn't quick enough to protect her barn mate. In fact, she barely moved. Lapis watched in desperation how Peridot got hit, how her body was covered in yellow threads of electricity and in the next moment, she was gone. Her green gemstone ended in the opposite wall and fell to the ground with a dull thump.

  
Corrupted gem was determined to protect its territory and didn't want to run away. It wasn't Quartz for sure. It was much smaller and its form reminded the body of lizard, colored yellow with some groups of big green scales. Impressive claws were like sharp knives, but its stare was sharper. However, Steven still couldn't figure out where its gemstone was. And it seemed that he had no time for it now. Lapis' eyes were glued to poofed Peridot all this time, but even a little movement of the corruption brought water gem's attention back to it. Chill ran down Steven's spine. He had never seen Lapis this mad. With quiet roar she clenched her fist and gave corrupted gem a glare. Some amount of water was summoned from the blue gemstone and in the next moment "lizard" was trapped inside the water bubble.

  
"L-lapis! Wait!" Steven tried to stop her, but it was no use. Lapis didn't hear him in her anger. The weight of water crushed against the yellow body ruthlessly, making it twitch in pathetic attempts of escaping. Eventually, brighter yellow threads covered the "lizard" signalizing the destruction. However, this corrupted gem didn't poof as any other. It cracked and exploded, throwing Lapis and Steven back. Torn parts of yellow body were flying to the sides. Water could not hold it and vaporized due to unexpected temperature.

  
Steven's reaction was better this time and he was able to protect his friend and himself with the bubble. "Are you okay?" nervous Lapis had to ask it anyway. It seemed that she came back to normal from her previous madness. Boy nodded and gave her a smile. "Yeah, I'm fine."

  
However, he didn't want to remove the pink protection yet. They still saw nothing, explosion raised the cloud of sand. But they heard very unpleasant sound, like something was cracking again... After a moment they rather heard than see the falling rock. Probably it was broken away with the explosion.

  
"Phew, seems that it landed right where we were standing before! I'm glad that it didn't fall on our heads!" Steven giggled nervously. He still was worried about Lapis' madness, but he was happy that no one got hurt. Blue gem nodded in agreement and suddenly froze. Not all of them were in the safe bubble. Lapis paled and looked at Steven with widened eyes. "Peridot..." Almost inaudible whisper left her lips. Boy blinked in confusion, but realization hit him soon after. They checked surroundings one more time, but there were no more corrupted gems. Rocks seemed fine too. Only then Steven removed his bubble and set them free.

  
"Stay close to me." Lapis put her hand on boy's shoulder and walked first. She failed at protecting Peridot, but she could not make same mistake with Steven. Boy nodded and went near blue gem, still keeping his shield at the ready. Everything was so quiet... The sand in the air was still present, but it didn't affect their vision too much, so they saw the fallen rocks painfully clear. Somewhere under it lay Peridot's gemstone. Without a word both of companions began to remove the stones. None of them wanted to think about what had happened to their green friend... But as time went on, Lapis became more and more nervous. Of course Steven noticed it, her trembling hands and growing desperation in the eyes. Probably she could not help, but see the pieces of broken gemstone in her own mind.

  
"She would be fine!" Steven gave Lapis a supportive smile. "Peridots are tougher than we think about them!" Being optimist to the bones really helped sometimes. Blue gem briefly looked at the boy and smiled slightly in response. Lapis knew that Steven was trying to comfort her and appreciated his effort. Silently she tried to convince herself that he was right.

  
All her mental efforts were broken at the moment her palm reached something cold. Lapis hold her breath and ran her fingers over the gemstone, inspecting it. It was in one piece for sure, Lapis felt no cracks as well, so she could finally sigh in relief. Holding the gemstone in her hand tight, but careful, she turned around and called for Steven. Boy appeared by her side almost immediately. Only then Lapis unclenched her hand and showed him the find. She was sure that everything would be fine, but when she saw gemstone in the light, blood froze in her veins. It was cracked. The fallen rock didn't break it from the outside, but made some damage inside the gemstone. In horror Lapis looked at the net of little cracks spreading from the "heart" of the green stone. That was the reason she didn't feel any damage before.

  
"It's... It's not a problem, is it?" Lapis tried her best to keep her voice steady and not trembling. "You still can heal her, right?"

  
Boy nodded and hummed in response. With pure determination on his face Steven licked his hand and put it on the green gemstone.

  
Nothing happened.

  
"Maybe it wasn't enough time? Let's try again!" Steven tried to convince both of them that situation was under control. Despite the enthusiastic voice Lazuli saw his nervousness.  
Suddenly Lapis felt like she was at the bottom of the ocean again. Pressure all around her, impenetrable darkness and suffocating fear. What happened to Peridot was her fault. Steven had tried to warn her, but she hadn't listened. Lapis' thoughts were like a painful tornado in her head. If she hadn't beat that corrupted gem, explosion wouldn't have happened! If she hadn't came here, nobody would have been hurt at all! If she...

  
"Lapis!!"

  
Blue gem flinched and looked at Steven. Boy's hands were on her shoulders now, probably he was trying to bring her back from the thoughts for a moment now.

  
"Lapis, she would be fine. Maybe my powers aren't strong enough to help her, but Mom's fountain will heal her, you'll see it!"

  
For a moment Steven didn't receive any response and he was getting afraid that Lapis hadn't hear him at all. But then she slowly nodded and got on her feet.

  
"Yes... You are right."

  
She had heard about Rose's magical tears, which could heal her cracked servants. And Steven once told her that there was the whole fountain with same power. Lazuli looked back at her hands and gently rubbed the green gemstone. They had to try. Peridot didn't deserve this. Lapis stood up and stretched her arm towards Steven.

  
"Let's go then." She even managed to smile a little bit. Boy grabbed the hand and return her the bright smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Thank you for your persisting interest and comments! It is warming my heart! I hope you will enjoy this part of the story as well!

It was a beautiful place. So green and calm... The water was softly gurgling in the fountain and Lapis tried to concentrate on this sound rather than on her own heavy thoughts. She was here alone now. The Crystal Gems have left to check the Beta Kindergarten for any other corrupted gems. Steven offered to stay with Lapis, but she rejected, convincing him that everything would be fine and that he was needed more in other place.

Lapis did not regret her decision. It was hard to be alone with her thoughts, but it would be even harder to maintain the meaningless conversation. She just needed to wait. Pearl had said that the  recovery process would take some time. So be it. She wouldn't leave this spot near the fountain until the gemstone would be in normal state again.

Lapis raised her head and lightly hit the edge of fountain with it. Pearl gently asked her not to check Peridot every five minutes and let her heal in peace, too. Lazuli knew that she was right, but it was so hard to resist!

"Come on, you already messed up. You want Peridot to heal properly, don't you?" thought she angrily. Lapis clutched her knees to the chest and stared at the spot somewhere in front of her.

"Just don't think about anything. It will be alright. Be patient. Peridot will recover. No bad thoughts are allowed." was she repeating mutely, like some kind of mantra.

Lapis tried to concentrate on something else. Her thoughts moved on Steven and Crystal Gems. Actually, not on them in general, but on their current mission. What were they doing right now? Did they find any other corrupted gems? Steven seemed really surprised to see it in Beta Kindergarten. Lapis could not held the soft chuckle. After all, she was right. Steven and Peridot have lured her to that place just to show off! Who knew that it would end so terribly... Lapis turned around and looked up to see the edge of the fountain. Was it enough time already? Could she check up on Peridot? Water gem led internal struggle for a while and finally made a compromise with herself. She got on her feet and climbed to the edge. Then Lapis sat down, crossed her legs and peered into the water below. The gemstone was visible at the bottom. She could see that cracks were slowly disappearing. Or was it just her hopes and imagination? Lazuli shook her head and, with big emotional effort, averted her eyes from poofed friend.

"Stop staring at that, it isn't helping Peridot nor you! Just wait a little longer and then you can go down and inspect her closer."

Lapis sat unmoving for a while, but then she began to tap fingers on her knee. She simply could not stay calm! Water gem knew that there was nothing she could do for Peridot right now. She felt so... useless... And this thought was so irritating! With quiet growl Lapis facepalmed.

"You have just one job now, to sit here and wait until Peridot will recover herself. And you can't even this do properly?! Look at you, what kind of friend are you?!"

"Well, you really are a clod, but I know that you care about me."

Water gem chuckled again. She was sure Peridot would say something like that. However, her mood went down pretty quickly. She was without Peri not even the half of the day, but she already started to carry on internal dialogue with her? She really was a mess!

Still, the whole situation was interesting in some way. Lapis was never left alone for a long time these days. Sometimes her barn mate was missing  the whole day, being dragged somewhere by Steven or Amethyst, but she always came back, even at the nighttime. And Lazuli always waited for her return... Lapis sighed and lowered her head. She never realized that she got so used to this tiny green piece of the gem! Never, until she was gone...

The rest of the day and whole night Lapis spent on the edge of the fountain, barely moving. She checked up on Peridot from time to time and, luckily, tears were working. However, water gem's mind was diving in the ocean of melancholia, drifting from thought to thought.

Finally, the sun was slowly appearing over the horizon. Lapis noticed that water somehow became even more pink and... bright?.. Blue gem sat up and took notice. She wasn't sure if star had affected this strange transformation. Lazuli jumped down to the bottom and kneeled in front of the gemstone. No cracks could be seen, it was just like new! Lapis could not held the bright smile. After a moment she was standing on the ground again, carefully checking the green stone from all angles. It seemed perfectly fine. Maybe even more shining than before! With soft, happy giggle Lapis covered the gemstone with her palm. Her mood raised straight to the sky and so did Lapis. She led her way to the Warp Pad. She had to let Steven know that Peridot's gemstone was healed.

 

... However, Lazuli didn't realize that it wasn't over yet. They still needed to wait until Peridot recreate her physical form. And who knows how much time would it take...

"Are you sure you don't want to stay?"

Pearl sounded a little bit nervous. She wasn't sure what would be better - let Lapis live in the Temple until Peridot comes back and at the same moment be at risk of Lapis' uncontrollable change of mood, which in most cases would cause "water problems." Or let Lapis live in the barn... Where she still could cause some damage, but, hopefully, in a lesser extent. Moreover, she got used in there...

"It's fine, I'll go back to the barn." Lapis sounded more confident about her words. She watched Steven as he was running across the room in his pajamas, collecting some stuff. "And sorry for interrupting." Lazuli felt a little bit ashamed of waking boy up. She forgot that it still was early in the morning and that her human friend would be still sleeping. But it seemed that this situation didn't bother Universe at all. Finally boy stopped near his blue friend and gave her a small basket. It contained Peridot's gemstone, wrapped in a green scarf with a print of yellow stars, lying on a pillow.

"Here it is! I think it would be more comfortable for you to take care of Peridot this way!" Steven gave Lapis a bright smile, as usual. Water gem chuckled and gently stroke his hair.

"Thank you, Steven. It sure would be. And I think Peridot would appreciate that lovely scarf."  

Crystal Gems were observing this interaction from the kitchen corner. Garnet was leaning against the fridge, while Pearl and Amethyst were near the table. Well, actually, the purple one was sitting on it...

Amethyst poked Pearl at her side.

"Yo, P. Are you sure she can leave? She seems kinda fine when Steven's around her."

Pearl jerked and looked at purple gem with discontent in the eyes.

"Well, it was her wish to come back to the barn. I don't think we should insist on her staying here if she does not want to..." Well, spear warrior still wasn't sure herself, so she looked for some help in Garnet. However, the fusion just gave her a thumb up with her common deadpan expression. With sigh Pearl looked back at Amethyst.

"Okaaay, gotcha. But we still should be at the ready? Y'know, for some..." Amethyst just waved with her hand, "... unexpected rainfall?"

Pearl averted her eyes from her shorter friend and looked back at Lapis.

"I suppose so."

 

A little later water gem landed in front of the barn. Veggie Head, barking happily, immediately ran out to meet its owners. Poor pumpkin never spent the night alone in the barn! It was jumping around Lapis, trying to lick her cheek.

"Hey-hey, calm down!" Lapis laughed and got down on the knees, putting basket with the gemstone on the ground by her side. She had to catch Veggie Head in her arms right after that.

"Sorry for leaving you alone for so long." Lazuli gently patted their specific dog on its head and earned satisfied rumbling. Now Veggie Head was able to complete its mission! Which was to lick Lapis all over her face... And while water gem was clearing herself, pumpkin noticed, that someone was still missing. The orange creature ran all over the barn and its closest neighborhood, barking. Like it was calling for someone... Lapis was silently observing the whole situation and caught Veggie Head in her arms again, when it was running nearby.

"Listen." With serious expression on her face Lazuli looked right into the eyes of the creature. "This is Peridot." Water gem turned Veggie Head, so it could see the gemstone. "She'll be like this for a while. So we have to protect her. Do you understand me?" Lapis looked at the "dog" again and receive a determined bark as an answer. "Good."

Lazuli put pumpkin back on the ground and got on her feet. "Come on. We have several things to do." She picked up the basket and went inside the barn. It still was going to be a long day...

 

Lapis tried to distract herself with her common activities. Somewhere inside her mind she was realizing  that she could not pretend like nothing had happened. And, honestly, Lazuli even didn't want to. The absence of her barn mate was too obvious. But it didn't mean that she would fall into apathy! Lapis still had things to do. For example, she had to water plants! Yep! Sounds like a good idea! And after a while water gem brought her plan to life.

The rest of the day was spent in a similar vein. Lapis finished several activities and, when night fell, she was lying on her belly on the couch in front of TV. The basket was here too and Lapis' arm was put round it casually. Water gem knew that there was no threat for Peridot, but she felt more comfortable having the gemstone by her side.

"Well, guess there is nothing to watch." Lapis switched the channels, but still couldn't find anything good. Of course she still could watch Camp Pining Hearts, but she didn't want to do so. It wouldn't be much fun without Peridot's comments! And it even felt wrong! It was something they always did together and Lapis didn't want to ruin it.

Finally, she gave up and turned TV off. The barn was immediately filled with silence and darkness. But after a while Lapis even began to enjoy it! It wasn't that dark anymore, the hole in the roof was providing enough starlight. And it wasn't that silent, she could hear soft breathing of Veggie Head. It was sleeping peacefully  on her legs and Lapis didn't want to disturb it. Actually, sleeping wasn't a bad idea! Time would pass faster... Lazuli hugged the basket with both arms, closed her eyes and tried to relax. After few more minutes she succeeded and was greeted in the arms of Morpheus...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello-hello! Thank you all again!  
> Originally I wanted to finish the story with third chapter... But somehow it split apart, so... Here you go!

"So, you didn't watch any single episode of Camp Pining Hearts without me?!"

A little bit nasal, high voice could be heard all over the barn. Lapis laughed, looking at Peridot. They were sitting on the second floor of the barn, on the couch. Green gem seemed really excited... And now Lapis realized, that those stars in green eyes and big smile were worth any waiting!

"Yep!" Blue gem nodded, confirming her words. "Actually, I think I wouldn't enjoy this show without you." Lapis shrugged. She simply told Peridot the truth, but it seemed that her words had offended tiny gem! With loud gasp technician pressed her hand against the chest.

"How can you even say something like that?! And I thought you truly understand the whole perfection of this human product!"

Peridot jumped from the couch and began to run in front of it. With waving hands and rapid speech she tried to explain Lapis why she was wrong. Blue gem, smiling widely, just nodded from time to time or hummed in agreement, but her thoughts were far away.  

"Hey, what are you laughing at?!"

Finally Peridot realized that all her efforts were in vain. With quiet rumbling she sharply turned around and marched towards the stairs.

"I think it would be better if you understand your mistake by yourself! So, we need to start from the very beginning! Season one tapes are still downstairs, aren't they?"

"Uh-huh." Lapis nodded in response, following Peridot visually. Green gem took few steps and then... Lazuli didn't even understand, what had happened. Probably her tiny friend had stumbled and , with dull thump and quiet "Ouch!" Peridot landed face-first on the ground. 

"Peri!!!" Lapis immediately appeared on the edge of the floor. "Are you alright?!" Blue gem summoned her wings and softly landed near technician. Peridot rose up, holding her forehead. Everything seemed out of focus, so she decided to sit on the floor for few more minutes.

"Yeah, I'm fine." But these words didn't persuade Lapis. So Peridot smiled awkwardly and gave Lazuli a thumb up. "It's nothing, really!"

"Mmm, sure." Water gem nodded in agreement, but it was obvious - she didn't believe in any single word Peridot had said. With sudden movement she caught her friend's head and pulled it closer.

"Whoa, wha-what are you doing?!" Peridot jerked and tried to look Lapis in the eyes. Sure, she was a little bit lying about her condition, but it was nothing! She would be fine in no time...

At least, she really hoped so.

"I am checking your gem. Stop moving." commanded Lapis, while scrutinizing the green stone. There was something like dark scratch, but maybe it was just a dirty strip on Peridot's visor?.. Lazuli stretched her hand towards it, but hesitantly stopped at the last moment.

"May I?"

Peridot just silently nodded. Water gem slid her finger other this mysterious dark spot, but it didn't disappear.

Lapis felt like she had frozen inside.

Without saying a word she removed visor from Peridot's face. Green gem blinked in confusion.

"Lazuli? Why are you like this? Is something wrong?" Well, Peridot already knew, that there WAS something wrong in her condition. She still couldn't see properly and she generally felt so... dizzy... But she hoped it was just temporary disorder.  

It simply HAD to be this way. She didn't want to make her friend worried again.

Lapis answered her with calm and steady voice. "It's nothing." Blue gem stood up and slowly led her way to the exit of the barn, still holding eye contact with Peridot.

"Stay here, okay? I have to visit Steven." Lapis turned around and summoned her wings, but she didn't have a chance to take off. She heard surprisingly calm and quiet question.

"I am cracked again, am I not?"

Lapis sharply turned round to face her friend. Peridot was still sitting on the floor.

"You don't have to lie. I can feel it." Technician put her hand on the gemstone and slide over the crack. Her palm felt sticky... Peridot looked at her hand just to see some green substance on it.

"P-peri, it would be fine! I just have to bring Steven here, so he can help you!" Lapis smiled at her poor friend, but Peridot just slowly shook her head.

"I don't want to disappoint you, but no. He cannot help me. The transformation had already begun."

Lapis tried her best to keep smiling confidently.

"Don't be silly. What are you even talking about?" But she knew painfully well, what was on Peridot's mind... Despite visible sadness in green eyes technician gave her a smile.

"Don't let me hurt Steven or you, okay? Rather poof me right after I become corrupted. I know you will take good care of my gem!" Peridot's voice wasn't even shaking. She had already accepted her fate. Crack was growing fast and Peridot knew pretty well, that Lapis could not reach Steven in time. So she just wanted to spend her last few minutes of sanity with her barn mate.

Peridot looked at Lapis again and tapped on the floor near herself.

"Can you come here, please?"

Without a word Lapis obeyed and almost fell on her knees near tiny gem. Peri frowned and turned to face her.

"Don't be so sad, Lazuli. That's..." she didn't have a chance to finish her sentence. With surprise Peridot found herself in tight embrace. That was rather... unexpected. But it felt so good...

"L-lazuli?"

No response.

"Lazuli, what are you..."

She was interrupted again. By surprisingly quiet and almost shaking voice.

"Please, don't go." 

Peridot froze.

"I beg you. Stay with me." Embrace became even tighter. Lapis was clinging to her friend like drowning person would cling to lifeline.

Peridot heard stifled sob.

"Lapis, I..." This time technician fell silent by herself. What could she say? There was nothing they could do to avoid the transformation! Peridot slowly put her arms around shaking blue body and closed her eyes.

No one of them knew, for how long they remained like this. And even when Peridot's form started to change, Lapis rejected to let her go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, we are not finished yet!


	4. Chapter 4

There was sudden and loud noise outside the barn. Lapis widely opened her eyes and almost immediately summoned water wings to fly upwards. She still wasn't fully awake and was hanging in the air, staring at their small lake. Water was so choppy... It looked like if it had fallen from the high. Lazuli looked at her hands and then back at the water. Probably it had fallen... There was a possibility that she couldn't handle her own power again. Lapis shook her head and slowly got back on the floor of the barn.

She was almost as confused as Veggie Head, who was sitting on the couch.

"Woof?"

Water gem ignored it. She had to try and restore past events.

"What had happened? And where... Where is Peridot?!"

Panic raised in Lapis' mind as she began to look around. She remembered now. Peri got corrupted! And she could not let her go outside like this! What if Crystal Gems found her first?!

"Woof!"

Even this time Veggie Head didn't attract her attention.

"She couldn't go far! I'll catch up with her in no time, then I have to bring her back and..."

"WOOF!!!"

Finally Lapis gave up. "What is it?!" She sharply turned round and met the eyes of the frowning pumpkin. Lazuli noticed one more thing too...

"Wait a minute..."

There was a familiar basket on the couch. The one Steven gave her.

A new realization hit her mind.

"Oh... Okay, I got it." Lapis finally relaxed and dropped herself back down on the couch, between the basket and Veggie Head. "Sorry, little one." She patted pumpkin on the head. "I had to listen to you from the beginning."

Lazuli put her hand in the basket and carefully pulled the green gemstone out. It was shining in the rays of the rising sun. No damage could be seen... Because no was caused. Lapis sighed and gently pressed her forehead to the green gem.

"Oh, Peridot. Please, come back soon," - whispered she. Water gem felt like she was losing her mind. Peridot was gone for the week already and with every passing day it was harder to deal with her absence. Until this moment Lapis was able to turn her mind off at least at the nights. But now... Her "nightmare topics" expanded. It wasn't her first bad dream about Peridot.

Lapis was still holding stone in her hands and she could not avert her eyes from it. 

How long ago did this start? Probably three days back.

First she saw the whole situation with the corruption in her dream. Lapis woke up with new wave of feeling guilty.

Next night her mind gave her a picture of destroyed Peridot. Luckily Lazuli didn't remember all of the details, but the point stayed in her memory painfully clear - broken green gem in her hands. 

And today in the dream Peridot became corrupted. Lapis sighed and covered the gemstone with the palm.

Well then, no more sleeping for her!

Water gem leaned back on the couch. Actually, one moment from her dream was still bothering Lapis. What if something would happen after Peridot restores her form? Sure, the possibility was pretty slim, but... She could not underestimate this potential danger.

Lapis put gemstone back in the basket and smiled at Veggie Head.

"Let's go, little one. We are going to pay a visit."

 

 

After some time she was standing at the doorway of Steven's house. Sweet boy was glad to see her, but the same could not be said about the others. Of course they didn't send her back nor say anything to show their dissatisfaction about her presence, but Lapis simply could feel some uneasiness.

That was fine. Lazuli didn't want them to like her. She wouldn't like them back, either. Not after what they've done to her... Lapis knew that one day she would cope with these painful memories of her imprisonment, but it definitely wouldn't happen anytime soon.

For now, they just needed to tolerate each other.

"Sorry for bothering you again." Water gem tried her best to sound polite. SHE needed THEM now, so let's play by their rules.

Pearl laughed nervously and just waved her hand. "Oh, Lapis, it's nothing!" She tried her best to look natural and friendly too.

Probably only Steven believed in the sincerity of the whole situation.

"This is ridiculous," - thought Lapis. However she immediately pulled herself together. "You are doing this for Peridot. So PLEASE calm down and behave. You don't want to cause her any more troubles, do you?"

Water gem embraced the basket even stronger. She was sitting on the couch and probably she would be here most of the time. Steven didn't mind it and probably other Crystal Gems wouldn't mind it either. At least she would always be in front of them...

She just needed to wait.

Everything was going to be okay.

 

Of course Steven didn't want Lapis to fall into despair, so he tried his best to keep her distracted. He asked water gem to play with him, or to go into town, or... many other silly things. Lapis took his attempts gratefully. It was really nice. He wanted to help and she didn't want to disappoint him with the fact that she would calm down only with Peridot's return. 

First few days everything went smoothly. She even helped Pearl in the kitchen and had some small chat with Amethyst. But as time passed, Lapis worried more and more. And it was pretty obvious for others...

"Hey, Steven, have a minute?" Amethyst dropped herself down on the couch. Boy averted his eyes from blue figure near the cooker and looked at his purple friend, silently nodding.

"Good. So... What's up, dude? You seemed kinda gloomy lately!" Gem pushed Steven with the elbow,  smiling slyly. Little Quartz chuckled, but his smile quickly faded.

"I'm worried about Peridot. She is in her gem for so long... I hope she'll come back soon!"  Boy sighed.

"Well man, you're not the only one missing her." Amethyst sighed as well and glanced at Lapis. It seemed that blue gem's mind was fully occupied with cooking. Purple Quartz stooped and looked inside the basket by tilting it to herself.   

"I wonder what takes her so long! Is she like Pearl or something?"

Probably Ame spoke too loud and it nearly led to some unpleasant consequences...

"What are you doing?"

Lapis seemed really angry. She still was at the kitchen corner, but boiling water in the pot behind her began raising up...

Amethyst immediately removed her hand from the basket. "Hey, hey! Calm down! I didn't hurt her or something!"

It wasn't clear if her words really calmed Lapis down, but at least water returned to her proper place back to the pot. Ame tried to talk to their guest again.

"Ya know, no one would hurt Peri. She is safe here! You can trust us!" Purple gem gave Lazuli a supportive smile. But blue one just lowered her head.

Room was filled with silence for a moment.

"I know." - finally, Lapis spoke. "I know that you wouldn't hurt her. I am... I am sorry." She looked away and grabbed her arm nervously. "It's just... She..." Lapis sighed and waved her hand. "Forget it. I will be on the beach if you need me." With rapid movements blue gem went to the door. The basket was left on the table...

 

The setting sun gave the ocean a pinkish hue. Breeze was playing with blue hair of the person sitting on the coast. Lapis located herself close enough to the water, but it still couldn't reach her.

Somehow this situation reminded her about her own state of affairs. Technically Peridot wasn't far away. Lapis could always go back and held the gemstone, but she could not reach the true personality. With a tired sigh she lowered her head and indulged in melancholy.

After some time water gem heard quiet steps nearby. She raised her eyes and met the light-blue one.

"Can I sit down?" asked Pearl calmly. Lapis shrugged and looked away.

"I don't own the beach or something."

Without a word spear warrior sat down next to her. Few more minutes they spent in silence. It wasn't the uncomfortable one, it somehow felt... right.

Maybe because Pearl could understand Lapis.

"Do you still miss her?"

Pearl jerked in surprise and turned to face Lapis. "Excuse me?"

Blue gem was clutching her legs to the chest, hugging them. However, her eyes were scrutinizing Pearl's face.

"Rose. Do you still miss Rose?"

Lapis could see the surprise in the light-blue eyes. Probably Pearl didn't expect the conversation to turn this way. Maybe she was asking herself, how was Lapis even able to know anything like that?

Well, Lapis took a part in the war, after all. She saw them on the battlefield and was a witness of their relationship as a mirror, before she was forgotten.

For a moment white gem was silent, hesitating. But finally she gently chuckled and looked at the water.

"Yes, I do. Even until know. And I will always miss her." - she said it so easily... A light and at the same time sad smile appeared on Pearl's face as she remembered her beloved mentor.

"She was simply perfect. Kind, but strong. Never wanted to cause senseless destruction, but was ready to protect what she thought was the best."

Lapis was silently listening. If someone in the past had told her that she would have heart-to-heart conversation with Pearl, she wouldn't believe them. But now this situation felt natural.

Both of them were similar in some way.

"She changed my life. Set me free. Showed me that I don't have to follow others expectations and simply be... me." Pearl laughed quietly. "However, I am not sure if she was happy with the last part. I guess she always thought that I exchanged Diamond's lead for hers. And I cannot say that she was wrong."

"But it was your OWN decision, wasn't it?"

Pearl nodded and looked at Lapis again. "Exactly."

They both fell silent one more time. Finally, Pearl softly spoke.

"I guess you understand what I was talking about."

Lapis gently chuckled and looked at the sky, where had appeared the first stars.

"Yes, I do."

 

Few more days had passed, but nothing changed. Peridot was still in her gem, Steven was still trying to distract Lapis and the last one was pretending that everything was fine, but she still was internally drowning even deeper in her melancholy. At least her aggression towards other Crystal Gems had disappeared. Now she simply was fully blue.

Lapis decided to spend some time on the beach again. Connie was visiting Steven and she didn't want to ruin their day with her own sadness. So, she played some silly human game with them and then excused herself, leaving Veggie Head as their company. Amethyst dragged Pearl to the town already in the morning and Garnet was rather spending her free time at her room. 

So, Lapis could be alone with Peridot. Or at least pretend this situation.

Blue gem sat down on the coast, so water could reach her feet. Basket with the precious content was standing right by Lapis' side.

"Today is a beautiful day. You are missing quite a lot already."

Of course water gem understood the absurdity of her actions, but she didn't care anymore. Maybe she was losing her mind? It didn't matter. She simply wanted to enjoy the conversation with Peridot.

"Everyone is worried about you. Steven, Veggie Head, Crystal Gems... And I." Lapis sighed.

"I know, I know. You can say: "But Lapis! Didn't you send me away some time ago?" And you'll be right! I wanted you to leave at that moment! And you obeyed without complaint." Lazuli rubbed her eye with the palm.

"To be honest, I am glad that Ruby Eye was chasing you that time. It forced you to come back." Blue gem chuckled and continued her monologue.

"So, do I have to send some Ruby after you or anything like that? I can persuade Garnet to unfuse, you know!" With sudden enthusiasm Lapis looked at the green gem. Of course it remained silent...

Lazuli slowly set her eyes back on the water surface and quietly added: "Actually, I am ready to do anything to see you again..."

There was no point to continue this silly game of hers. Blue gem stayed silent and only the sound of waves was her faithful companion. 

 

Few hours were spent like this, before sudden light-green glow attracted her attention. Lapis turned her head and felt how her non-existent heart had skipped a beat. Triangular gem had left the basket and was floating in the air, shining like a little star!

Peridot was finally coming back!!!

Lapis put the basket aside, leaving more space for technician. Finally familiar form begun showing up and after a minute Peridot was standing on the ground, safe and sound. She looked around, figuring out where and with who she was. And it seemed she was really glad to see Lapis by her side...

"Oh, did you miss me, Lazuli?" Peridot smiled widely. But after a minute with no response from deadpanned Lapis made her a little bit nervous...

"L-lazuli?.."

Finally she got a snort as an answer.

"Holy Smoke, Peridot!" Lapis could not control herself anymore and burst out laughing. Of course Peridot decided to change her appearance for more suitable. Well, in the way of her own understanding. And there she was, standing in front of Lapis like an alien version of Percy's cosplayer.

Green gem immediately pouted and crossed her arms on the chest.

"Cut it off, Lazuli! You don't understand anything!" She looked away, grumbling. But she didn't have a chance to express her dissatisfaction more. Two blue arms appeared on her shoulder and in the next moment she was pulled into the strong embrace.

"I am sorry, Peri." Lapis was still giggling, hugging her barn mate and gently stroking her hair. "It suits you well. You look... adorable."

Peridot slowly blushed. First, she was face-pressed against Lapis' chest. Second, not every day she was able to hear such type of words from Lapis! And third... Her embrace was really strong and nice...

Peridot hugged the taller gem in response.

"So you DID miss me." Chuckled she, burring her face in the blue shoulder.

"Of course I did, you silly piece of the gem," - answered Lapis softly. "And speaking of that..."

In the blink of the eye Peridot was caught under her arms and raised in the air, so both of the gems were same eye-level.

"Sacrifice yourself for me one more time and I will not forgive you," - said Lapis seriously. But green one just shrugged and grinned in response.

"You know I cannot promise something like that!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that "nightmare theme" is already a cliché, but I used it anyway :D
> 
> Thanks again and see you on Friday with one last chapter!


	5. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your wonderful comments, kudos and general support! I am glad that you stayed with this story until its end. Have a nice day and see you later!

Three days had passed since Peridot's return and finally she was able to persuade Lapis about her stable and good condition, so they could go back to the barn.

It was a peaceful evening. The sun was setting and the first stars began to appear in the sky. Both of the gems were sitting on the roof of the barn, amusing each other with small talk.

This whole time Peridot was feeling somehow... strange. It was because of Lapis. It felt like blue gem had changed while she was missing. Peridot could not explain what exactly felt different, but it simply was that way! Maybe it was something in her eyes? These precious bright blue eyes, which were looking at her with warmth and affection...

"Peri, you're spacing out again," - chuckled Lapis. Technician jerked and immediately looked away.

"Ah, s-sorry! Did you say anything?" - she suppressed the urge to hit herself in the face. Was she staring at Lapis all this time?! 

She couldn't see that blue one was enjoying this situation way too much...

"Yes, actually. I was asking you something," - Lapis leaned closer to her barn mate.

Peridot felt her palms sweating. Just a moment ago she was sure that it was technically impossible.

"C-can you repeat it, please?" - she gulped, unable to avert her gaze from the blue eyes in front of her.

"Sure," - Lapis smirked. She wasn't planning to let Peri be so easily.

"Once you had told me about your desire to see the Earth. You know, not some simple excursion to the Empire City, but something... bigger?" she moved her fingers in the air, trying to find the proper word.

Peridot carefully nodded.

"Yes, I do remember it. And so ..?" - she still didn't understand where it all was headed.

Lapis gently smiled and this simple action warmed Peri's heart.

"I was thinking... Maybe you would like to explore the Earth with me."

Green gem couldn't believe her ears.

"Wait a minute. Are you suggesting ..?"

Lapis nodded.

"Yes. We can do it together." Then she quickly added with a less sure smile: "Of course, if you want me as your company. But I will understand, if you..."

Peridot didn't let her finish the sentence. She strongly embraced blue gem with a big happy smile on her face.

"You know that I would love to, Lapis Lazuli."


End file.
